Dabihwow
Dabihwow
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@ClamorVentus said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2113721#Comment_2113721
I dont know what this is actually based off, and i feel its suspense. I always liked that type of stories.
Its based off or inspired off of Silent Hill, Stranger Things, Outlast, and RE
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@ClamorVentus said:
Excellent!
Anything you particularly like?
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Oh awesome I'd like to see, I also kinda forgot to mention some of the descriptions about FUrnace HEad, he wears old fashioned galoshes as well, but I'll let you do you
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@Beelzeboop said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2109972#Comment_2109972
Some names for the creatures (I assume they're fairly common monsters):
Vore
The Wretched Ones
Fridge Horrors
Carrion Creepers
Putrid
Raw Peel
Bloated Abominations
Rotten Beasts
Gluttonous
These are just off the top of my head. Are any of these good?
I like Fridge Horrors, Carrion creepers, and Gluttonous, but recently I thought of the work Pickeaters
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@GoobyNugget said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2109972#Comment_2109972
Sooo it'd be a leftovers monster?
Basically, it was something that popped in my head when creating a list of monsters I could add, the thing is these things are humanoid, but animal, originally they had no meaning but they now represent hunger or gluttony
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Well thats nice, I thought they actually were going to gut him
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@Beelzeboop said:
@Dabihwow no problem at all, bug me anytime you want.
Yeah, I really like the description. I didn't respond when you posted it at first mainly because I couldn't really think of an appropriate response to that, not because it had any issues. It was pretty good as it was, but improving something already good shows dedication and passion, two of the most important virtues needed for an artist like yourself.
You really hit home with the symbolism there, and I want you to know that I understand completely. The idea of a monster representing bottled up rage, depression, and frustration has been done before, but this one feels fundamentally unique.
I feel like everyone can relate to this thing to some extent, and, in the end, that's the point of symbolism: to subtly tell a story without having to explicitly say the details. Like an inside joke, but more dramatic than funny.
All in all, a great monster with excellent symbolism, a powerful premise, and a wonderfully horrific design. In less pretentious terms, you did a good job.
Thank you, I have been struggling to understand what symbolism can bring, and before Furnace Head, was a monster I struggled to make, something new unique, impactful, but also terrifying.
Edit that other monste rthat Furnace Head kills, I'm stuggling to come up a name for it, but the idea of it was what if the food you thre away or didn't eat out of picky eating, could harm you.
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@Beelzeboop sorry to bug you again but was my description of Furnace Head better, this time?
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@GoodBoyKaru said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2107276#Comment_2107276
I'm not the leader of that server, the entire Council would have to decide yay or nay
Well actually we could just be friends is what I mean
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@GoodBoyKaru said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2107276#Comment_2107276
I'm not the leader of that server, the entire Council would have to decide yay or nay
Oh boy
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@GoodBoyKaru said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2107265#Comment_2107265
that's discord, he's a ps4 player
I'd like to join, maybe we could share it privately on twitter or something. I'd like to hang out with you man
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@GoodBoyKaru said:
I can get you in contact with @OniWantsYourMacaroni
Your friends with him in on steam?
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@Beelzeboop said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2107029#Comment_2107029
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2107043#Comment_2107043
Oh, sorry. I didn't realize that QwQw was actually your editor. In that case, I'll refrain from criticizing your spelling and punctuation, since you have someone handling it.
I didn't mean to insinuate that you were ignoring symbolism. The Dollitrix makes it clear that you understand it and are implementing it, but I didn't understand what the symbolism for Furnace Head was supposed to be. Ambiguity is a common but strong horror writing tool, so I want to encourage it, not discourage it.
I want to make it clear that I love the design for the guy. I just thought that with all the similarities, Pinebrook looks a bit too close to a Silent Hills knock-off for me to feel comfortable not mentioning it.
The whole school thing makes a lot of sense, TBH. I often get my best ideas while practicing my cursive. I'll start being a little less critical in some areas with the circumstances in mind.
Its fine I absolutely get it, Silent Hill actually is a big reason for me writing Pinebrook to begin with. The detail and horror that it showed, I was a bit sad that we don't see it in the way Silent Hill made it, so in a way Pinebrook is me reviving that side of horror,
Furnace Head was actually inspired off of Nemesis, PH, The Keeper, and Jason Voorhees, but really he is a very personal creature to me. I created him during a very dark time of my life, I was angry with who I was and I hated what was happening with my life, not seeing my friends, and I hated painting a smile that things were going to get better when I kept telling myself they weren't. I was anxious I was restless, yet I still bottled it up, and then I wondered if anger was a monster or a person what would it be. Furnace Head was my way of expressing my pain of keeping my anger bottled up how it killed me on the inside, to show what happens when we let our anger slip through the cracks, and what the result is when brought upon others. The result is that they are left harmed, scarred, and in pain, he enacts it though abbussive and violent means, whether it be ######### to ease the sexual frustration, beating them with a chain ( mimicking how a dad spanking his child with a belt), and these are some I can think off the top of my head
EDIT: reworded it
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@[Deleted User] said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2107076#Comment_2107076
Is your steam fully live? It's Tuesday.
It usually is and Checked it, everything's fine
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I can't connect to it strangely
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@QwQw said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2107029#Comment_2107029
Thanks! And by the way, sorry for kind of taking a break from editing. Recently with school starting back up for me, my life's been a bit busier than before.
Oh its fine take your time
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@Beelzeboop said:
Alright, now onto pages 4-5 1/2.
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2058962#Comment_2058962
"Elliot grabbed a handful and washed his face, he got a handful and began washing his face."
Always write thoughts in italic. It makes it less confusing for the average reader.
Punctuation again, particularly in the seventh paragraph.
Sixth paragraph has issues with pacing towards the end due to run-on sentences.
Sixth and seventh paragraphs seem to have issues with choosing the right words. I can't really call the problem anything else, but the issue is understandable. "Sighed" in the place of "side" fits with the tone, but not exactly with the english language. "Starred" was probably just a typo now that I think about it, so I'll let you off the hook (pun intended).
The issues with the writing I've noted combine to make it really hard to visualize the cow stalker in the room.
Three and four were great. Not just good, but actually, genuinely great. It reminds me of the scene in... Devotion, was it? where the player character starts washing his hands, then starts seeing blood on his hands, so he starts washing harder and faster until he's rubbing his skin raw. He looks at his hands, staring at the gore pooled in his palms.
I wanna criticize the hooks and chains, but I can't really. It feels just a tiny bit too close to the Otherworld from SH, but I honestly adore the idea of the environment being exactly the same except for meat hooks and chains hanging from the ceiling, dripping fresh, hot, sanguine fluids of unknown origins.
It was pretty ambitious of you to try and make paragraph seven mostly auditory. Writing Monsters, one of the books I recommended, has an entire section on making stretches of the story where we only get one sense, going into everything from hearing to even tasting. Overall, with the level experience you have, pretty good. I probably couldn't do much better.
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2068773#Comment_2068773
Same issues as the last page, but with notably more typos. The most egregious (to me specifically) have to be the use of the wrong "your." Repeatedly.
You seem to be overusing certain words.
"Ripe aroma" shouldn't have appeared twice. I would suggest either making it "the same ripe aroma from the bedsheets," for more clarity, or change the word the second time to some other words. Noisome, putrid, wretched, vile, even just plain awful would work. Be extravagant!
The curb-stomp battle between Fridge Horror and The Furnace Thing was a bit difficult to read. You didn't specify which one was which, so the reader has to gather which one is "the creature" and which one is "the monster" from context clues. A quick fix would be to refer to Furnace Head as "the furnace thing" during the whole fight. Also, unless the narrator (in this case, Elliot, even though it is in third person limited) has reason to believe that the word is an actual name, don't capitalize a word. The exception is if the designation is essentially going to act as a name, and even that is a stylistic choice.
Its a bit too early to tell, but with these types of monsters, the designs need to be heavily symbolic, and I'm not seeing that in Furnace Head here. Once again, maybe it just hasn't shown up yet, but it reminds me a bit too much of Pyramid Head, just without masterful execution in the best horror game ever made. Look up "Silent Hill Butcher."
EDIT: Just got to the third page of the thread. I understand the symbolism now. Kinda embarrassed I didn't get it before.
Just a note: an axe with an overly long handle is called a halberd. Its a medieval weapon used for taking out targets who thought that their shields would make up for a lack of armor.
I love the monster descriptions. Flawed as they may be in execution, in concept they all strike gold. I honestly want to draw them both. If I ever do, I'll have to use my drawing tablet so I can post the pictures here.
I also have an idea for a stalker based on the concept of a fear of commitment, so I might send you a picture of that idea too.
Well I am thankful for the criticism and I do have @QwQw who is editing it for me. Problem is that I mostly am writing these when I'm at school on a draft her eon the forums, and when I have to go move to a new class, I kinda lose focus a bit on what I was writing beforehand ( also thank you Qw!). I don't leave the symbolic parts out, I tend to give very little to an idea of what these characters are. However Furnace Head design wise, I think its fine, however the thing is Furnace Head isn't an actual monster, I can't tell you exactly what he is, but I can tell you is that some of his physical description is to show this characters' story, also I know what halberd is I chose it be a fire axe to follow along with this character symbolism, originally he was supposed to wear a fireman helmet ( which I might allow, at some point), but I felt it would've been way to obvious for what this character was.
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@Beelzeboop said:
I'm back, and I'm gonna try to behave this time. I've missed talking to you. And criticizing you. Speaking of which:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2006411#Comment_2006411
You kind of abused the linking words in a couple of places. For example:
He unclipped it from his pocket and cut himself free which left him alone in the dark.The way this is worded makes it seem like cutting himself free is the event that causes him to be alone and in an area with little to no light. Given the genre, this might be intentional, but it seems like a mistake.
One major problem that I'm seeing is confusion in punctuation. For example:
Elliot took a deep breath and exhaled, he just wanted to go home and get out.Putting a period in place of the comma would make the flow better and make the sentence slightly easier to read. Remember that a good portion of writing is the illusion that the author is eloquent and skilled beyond reasonability. The best way to do this is through the use of heavy editing, even when it takes some humanity out of the piece.
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2055328#Comment_2055328
Same issue with commas being used in the place of periods or being absent altogether, but I can tell you've improved signifigantly since the last page.
I've also noticed a distinct lack of the application of the very important rule "show, don't tell," which admittedly I suffer with myself at times. Actually, you did the showing part excellently, but you also added the "telling" part, which the rule specifically says not to do. This wouldn't be that big of a deal if the genre you seem to be going for wasn't Slightly Surreal Psychological/Survival Horror, since each genre added into the mashup relies heavily on this rule.
I love the Bubblehead Nurse vibe I'm getting here.
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2056143#Comment_2056143
I don't know any good tutors for coding, but I do know some good youtubers for game design. Google "Adam Millard - The Architect of Games," "Gamemaker's Toolbox"(this is actually the group that organizes gamejams), and potentially look up Jacob Geller, even though hes more about video essays on video games than analyzing their design.
A good book on the subject would be GURPS: Horror, even though its mainly focused on tabletop gaming, specifically the writing and designing part. Plus, it has a list of horror classics to check out in the back of the book, with everything from Bioshock to Frankenstein, or The Modern Prometheus. About half of it is GURPS (Generic Universal Roleplaying System) specific stuff, which may not seem useful, but I found the system is fairly easy to model monsters and characters in, since its basically the TV Tropes of TTRPGs.
Speaking of TV Tropes, I would suggest checking them out, especially the "So You Want To/ Write a Survival Horror Game" and the "Horror Tropes" pages.
While I'm suggesting references, I should probably suggest some books on writing in general. the book Writing Monsters: How to Craft Believably Terrifying Creatures to Enhance Your Horror, Fantasy, and Science Fiction, by Phillip Athans. Its a good book, and has plenty of tips on speculative fiction writing, especially horror, besides the content advertised in the title. It helped me a lot, and is one of my favorite books on writing.
Pretty much any book by Scott McCloud is a great choice, specifically Understanding Comics, as it talks about the creation of media, stylization, and communicating through stories in general.
I'll to a post discussing the second page of this thread soon, but this one is just for the first page so far.
I'm sorry I missed so much of this. This is honestly great, and I'm proud to be part of it, even with such a small role.
OH MY ######### god your back I missed you man yeah I will work on this in time and thank you for the comments
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@QwQw said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2105583#Comment_2105583
All we can do is hope that we get Jack as a killer.
We better hope to god its the next chapter
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@CornHub said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2105575#Comment_2105575
Possibly, but he hasn't gotten any tome lore so all we know is that he used it solely to help him kidnap people.
We were supposed to get lore for him in Tome 5 but they changed it to advertise the god forsaken event called the 2020 Blight event
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@Friendly_Blendette said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2105568#Comment_2105568
but like did he not also tourture them and I would assume he would do things while they were drugged
Sorry to bump in but In my head canon, I'd imagined Clown would torture them and leave scars upon the body. If his victims showed resistance he would grab their hand and slice off all their fingers as punishment.
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@JesseJH28 said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2052080#Comment_2052080
Give me this chapter right now.
It does need some work power wise, but I think its a nice good selection of perks particularly in Gen defense.
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I actually found out they have a way of easily installing these said icons, when I got my own personal icons in the game I was balls deep scared of ######### up the code. I hit the download button, and make sure the game was working as intended it apparently downloaded itself into the game
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@FrenziedRoach said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2104963#Comment_2104963
Doctor isn't realistic... You've never heard of the monkey head experiments I take it? Or the man the Doc is likely based on, Yang Yongxin? Science has had several darker turns and Doc represents that dark side quite well.
I thought Doctor was heavily inspired off of Joseph Mengele really, I never heard Yang Yongxin, I'll check him later.
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@Alice_pbg said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2104881#Comment_2104881
these are not stupid #########.
r*, terrorism. all of these are very serious and can be very triggering for people. and shouldn't be added to something just because.
just because it doesn't trigger you, doesn't mean they are stupid.
I'm not saying terrorism is stupid or anything like that what I meant was something like subjects the Movie Candyman brought up might be a bit touchy today for people today, and some aspects of horror that while brings up important issues that should be talked about, are just forced out of the way, and silenced for being to touchy.
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@CornHub said:
For all the original killers all of them are pretty much just murders or crazy. I understand why they can't put Nazis or Klan members in the game, but pedophiles, rapists, terrorists, ect..., aren't in the lore or motivations of any of the original killers. Why are the devs holding out from the more dark aspects of horror.
Since some of those topics aren't allowed in some countries, and in this day and age ( at least from my experience) everyone is so sensitive over the most stupid #########
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@QwQw said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/242131/thoughts-on-this-video
Ah, @Dabihwow recommended me this video in his thread about RE in dbd.
Honestly it makes perfect sense to me. Nemesis and Mr. X are just big walking slabs of meat, they might as well be robots considering their one goal (If You Can Call It That) is to do ######### for Umbrella. Not to mention their pure size alone would make implementing them a pretty hard task.
I think it would be the best of both worlds if the devs embraced the roots of RE by adding Chris and Jill as survivors, but also it's modernity by making Jack the killer.
Here is the video
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@GeneralV said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2103706#Comment_2103706
Yeah, I usually don't insult the community either. I like to think of us as a family. A weird, divided and complicated family, but a family nonetheless.
Same, its sad when some of us go though
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HOLY CRAP, THAT DAMN COON IS LIVING THE LIFE OF A KING! LOOK HOW FAT HE IS! DAMN HE PUTS CLOWN TO SHAME
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@Verconissp said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2103706#Comment_2103706
You're such a goddamn cute ######### i swear to all that is the Entity's Left and Right hand,
I will hug you and treat you to a goddamn good time out on a Plagueless day,
its not #########, thats son of a ######### to you, you no good son of a ######### camping bubba ( I know this is terrible)
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@GoodBoyKaru said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2103761#Comment_2103761
There is a small hamster who doesn't like my brother and does like to attempt to climb onto my head, yes.
Aw cute, I own a two pugs, one is named Mr.Chubbes, he's four years old, and the other is a rescue pug and her name is Ellie, though I prefer Chubbes. Before we got Ellie, Chubbes was my alarm clock if I slept in he would go inside my room sit at the foot of my bed and whine, sometimes he would hop up on my bed and claw at me, one time though he farted on my face to wake me up and I was absolutely pissed. But I love him hes my buddy, the only thing I'm concerned is the fact that he sometimes thinks he's human, no joke he act like he deserves royalty, and to be treated like a king, makes you think.
Ellie was our most recent addition, and poor girl was so skinny, you could feel all the tips of her spine, even ribcage. I struggled to have patience for her sadly but thankfully she has adjusted. However she eats a lot more then Chubbes and everytime I either have a snack or food she bolts to me and begs to everlasting hell, she even ate two bowls of dog food for ######### sake.
Anyway those are my two dogs that I ahve currently
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@GoodBoyKaru said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2103740#Comment_2103740
God I wish I owned all of these babus.
Genuinely just Google images + my friends sending me cute things when I'm sad. I save them because they help keep my mental health issues far enough away that I can tolerate existing most of the time.
Soon as I can afford to, though, I'm getting two pet donkeys and two pet cows and I'm going to raise them up from children and I will cuddle them so tightly
Do you own an animal at all?
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@GoodBoyKaru said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2103710#Comment_2103710
I'm not sure those two things are related at all
If it makes you better How about I ask do you even own all these animals?
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@GoodBoyKaru said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2103710#Comment_2103710
I'm not sure those two things are related at all
@Verconissp said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2103710#Comment_2103710
Nuffin wrong with cute animal pictures my friend.
and nuffin wrong with being one
I'm trying to be funny damn it
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@GoodBoyKaru said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2103657#Comment_2103657
https://us.v-cdn.net/6030815/uploads/S3B4NI7G2JGE/1167535.jpg
You have nothing on Me or my army. I will fight to defend My throne till the end.
Geez with the amount of animal pics oyu have I'd mistake you for a furry
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I can't honestly remember the last time a wholesome posts. for insult: I need help on this one I really don't like to insult this community lmao
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@DwightFairfield said:
Ethan is my favorite character in Resident Evil, low A tier seems just right for him
THat fact he didn't have as much personality is kinda why he's on the low A tier, but he is still my favorite one so far. I didn't like Chris as much though, but I made him S tier for the sake of fans, honestly I guess why people didn't like RE 7 that much was due to the fact, there were no RE characters until the end of the game. Which to be fair if we played as Chris or Leon from the beginning it would've destroyed the fear that RE 7 brought, those characters have been through so much that this would've been absolutely normal for them, I want Ethan to stick around a lot longer for he seems the most human of the main cast of characters.
Joe Baker imo is more badass then Chris though, dude literally fought Jack Baker and a swarm of Molded with his bare hands. He was one of the best RE characters I've ever seen
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@QwQw said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2102568#Comment_2102568
What do they require? To see the fan chapter?
Yes although I linked it I'm not sir if they saw it
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Can I say that is one helluva grind, that is impressive as hell dude
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I would like to see RE chapter created as something for both the older fans like Jill, Chris, Nemesis, but also something for the more modern fans like Jack Baker, Ethan Winters, or others
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@QwQw said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2102268#Comment_2102268
Do I smell someone who requires my assistance?
Indeed you do my fellow friend
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@Jarol said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2102172#Comment_2102172
That also I forgot to say, the type of armament he occupies, Nemesis would be the most OP and destructive of all, it is for that reason that others want Mr. X instead of him. Since he occupies the enormous strength of him. But Jack Baker I'm not sure what his power would be, unfortunately I haven't played RE7 to understand it. The only game that I may play is RE2 to fully understand what a Tyrant like Mr. X and an iconic survivor like "Leon" is capable of, who is the survivor I most desire of all. But it is a matter of business and luckily at least having them here.
I know someone who can gladly educate you @QwQw can help with this. So he created a fan made concept of what Jack would look like in DBD, basically Jack gets stronger the more the gens gets done and requires skill from the survivors end here a link to his work from one of my posts
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/232904/my-re-7-character-tierlist#latest
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@Jarol said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2102107#Comment_2102107
That is my problem with RE, there are many good villains, but the problem is "choosing" or which one will be awarded to behaviur for a possible collaboration. A Tyrant may be good or fearsome, but even if he receives orders, the entity can fix that. On the other hand, other villains like Jack Baker or Albert Wesker (I'm not very sure with the latter since I got confused between the movie or the video game) can be manipulated or be willing to kill or the most silly idea, bring a zombie to dead by daylight. I just hope that if it's RE, the fifth anniversary, they surprise us with a maximum of 2 killers. I think it is the most convenient but at the same time impossible for it to happen. Instead 2 survivors is possible.
I mean sure the Entity can do that to the Tyrants, but in order for them to live up to the legacy they made, they have to be just as powerful as they were in the games. If that were to happen, it would be 4k simulator until a massive nerf comes in. Which would anger both killer mains and the RE community, plus Nemesis can't use his Rocket Launcher, I can't imagine Nemesis without it either, it makes up his personality, but would be so illogical to use against survivors for they would be dead in seconds.
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Press F in the chat to honor, Silent hill. Honestly P.T. and it being canceled is by far the most damning ######### up in the whole Video game horror genre, even more so than RE 6 in which, no way in hell I'm touching. Its so sad
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And here I thought I was dramatic, /joke. Yeah Liver should've been base kit
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@SallySlugson said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2102032#Comment_2102032
Because of Konami. They hate creativity lmao
I still give them the mighty middle finger for destroying P.T.
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@Jarol said:
I keep thinking of an RE episode involving 2 killers and 2 survivors to balance the scale. I mean. Have Nemesis or Mr. X or Jack Baker, but a Tyrant is the most fearsome of all RE and that fits more perfectly than a crazy old man similar to Deathslinger.
The problem is that Tyrants are created to serve umbrella and are programmed to do so, in the video he makes some very solid statements. Adding a monster like MR. X or Nemesis, they have to hinder away what makes Nemesis, well Nemesis. Which would leave people unsatisfied with the fact these aren't the monsters we all grew to love, their more like a big chunk of meat basically
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@Todgeweiht said:
https://forum.deadbydaylight.com/en/discussion/comment/2102064#Comment_2102064
Me too. Hopefully huntress, I don't think we are getting a chase theme for Freddy due to the whole legal dispute.
Yeah I don't expect Freddy but Huntress, sure maybe.
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Why do I kinda hope they add some more theme music for the killers
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Thank god I got his adept achievement